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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/23753296">All That Whispers Avow</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/MissDrarryDawn/pseuds/MissDrarryDawn'>MissDrarryDawn</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>The List [4]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>36 questions, Boys Kissing, Detention, Fluff, Love Confessions, M/M, Mild Angst, Pining, Post War, Secret love, Talking, being honest, eighth year, this entire fic is one huge conversation wtf</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-04-20</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-04-20</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-02 16:34:01</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Mature</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>11,465</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/23753296</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/MissDrarryDawn/pseuds/MissDrarryDawn</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Harry and Draco get detention for getting into yet another fight. It's not what they expected.</p><p>//Completed<br/>//Word count: 11.4k</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Draco Malfoy/Harry Potter</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>The List [4]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/series/1711096</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>28</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>445</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>All That Whispers Avow</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><ul class="associations">
      <li>For <a href="https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheReadingWriter/gifts">TheReadingWriter</a>.</li>



    </ul><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>Happy birthday, Lia!</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Harry squirmed in his seat, withered under his teacher's hard glare. Next to him, Malfoy wasn't faring much better either.</p><p>They'd gotten into yet another fight...</p><p>Of <em>course </em>they had.</p><p>Harry had really thought that after returning from the war that he knew better than to give in to Malfoy picking a fight. He was sure Malfoy knew better than to actually pick a fight in the first place.</p><p>Guess not.</p><p>Though...to be completely fair, the reason they got into a fight this time was...<em>odd.</em></p><p>
  <em>~</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Harry hugged Ginny when she came into the classroom to congratulate her for getting a Quidditch apprenticeship with the Holyhead Harpies after she graduated, and Malfoy had apparently seen and sneered his ugliest sneer yet:</em>
</p><p>
  <em>"Do get a room and spare the rest of us the hideous PDA."</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Harry just stared at him, did Malfoy think they he and Ginny were dating? </em>
</p><p>
  <em>"Uh—Malfoy , we aren't dati—"</em>
</p><p>
  <em>"Did I ask? Do I look like I care?" Mafoy cut him off with a scoff and a shake of his head.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>"Yes, since you felt the need to comment." Harry pointed out dryly, and it appeared as though, only for a moment, Malfoy's eyes flickered. Then he rolled them and scowled:</em>
</p><p>
  <em>"Please, as if I'd have any reason to." </em>
</p><p>
  <em>"Then why the bloody hell did you do it?" Harry bit.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Truth was, he had grown to really care about Malfoy. Ever since 6th really, he had caught himself stressed and feeling more alone than ever one evening and the first thing he'd thought of was Malfoy. Draco. He wanted him there, wanted to share that moment of weakness with him, for a reason Harry didn't understand then, but was able to understand over time. And now it terrified him to think about it, since nothing about Malfoy's behavior towards Harry had given even an inch even after everything—it shouldn't be attractive, to be insulted. But there was something in the specific way Malfoy insulted him that made Harry feel like there was a fire burning under his skin, and he'd been cold for so long, he'd be damned if he gave up on this thing that warmed him up, even if it were in the worst of ways.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Malfoy's crude, resentful comments still hurt sometimes though, even though they never failed to ignite Harry, and sometimes, Harry just wished Malfoy would pretend Harry didn't exist altogether, rather than insult him. Even though the thought of never having Malfoy's attention also hurt, even if it was negative.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>In conclusion, Harry was seriously messed up for wanting Malfoy, all of him, in every conceivable way. Seriously fucked up to love him.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>But it was what it was, Harry supposed. He'd tried to keep his head clear, above the water, he tried to remind himself a hundred times how much Malfoy had always tried to harm him, yet whenever he thought about that, all Harry's heart would supply in argument to his mind is how Malfoy cried in a girl's bathroom because he truly had had no one at the time. And how Harry had nearly killed him then. How Malfoy had looked him straight in the eyes and said 'I can't be sure.' How Malfoy's voice trembled, yet he still lied resolutely.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>And so, the battle was lost. The heart won, as it always tended to with Harry.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>"I commented because it's disgusting." Malfoy snapped Harry out of his train of thought.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>It made Harry sad to see Malfoy so full of anger and so defensive all the time, because Harry had seen him be better. In fact, he was better these days, to everyone else—except Harry.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>"Don't look then, for God's sake, can't you just ignore me?" Harry had sighed, and voiced what he'd been feeling. Between Malfoy constantly insulting him and ignoring him outright, it hurt much less to be ignored. "I didn't deserve this." Harry had tacked on, a bit bitterly, because he knew! He bloody knew Malfoy had a conscience, that he bloody cared! Harry wanted to remind him of his conscience, because he wanted Malfoy to be better. And he was getting nowhere like this.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Malfoy's face broke for a moment, but then he scoffed and rolled his eyes, though he said nothing for a long moment.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Harry had assumed it was over and had made to sit back in his seat before McGonagall walked in, but as he took a step, his feet caught on nothing and he went flying forwards, crashing into the floor and narrowly missing hitting his head on the desk corner.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>As he huffed in pain, attempting to get his bearings, he slowly pushed himself up and looked around as he tacked his glasses back onto his nose. Malfoy had his wand out, eyes burning with...anger, but there was something else there too, that Harry didn't have time to decipher because his own temper flared:</em>
</p><p>
  <em>"The fuck Malfoy?" He snarled as he slowly stood and limped on his banged up knee.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>But Malfoy didn't have anything to say. His jaw was knotted tight and gray eyes still blazing while Harry glared at him.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>There was anger in his eyes, yes, but the second, underlying emotion was...guilt. Shame.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Harry's anger depleted and he sighed deeply. Malfoy didn't need reminders, none of them did. Harry had it coming for him. He was just about to open his mouth to say something, when—</em>
</p><p>
  <em>"Boys. Detention after class today." McGonagall cleared her throat, having apparently entered the classroom and seen their entire fight.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Both Harry and Malfoy whirled around to gape at her, but her gaze was unyielding.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>"Draco, for casting that hex, Harry, for instigating it." She said nothing more of the matter, rather turned around to the blackboard and picked up some chalk.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Harry had wanted to argue—but he supposed he did instigate Malfoy, in a way.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>~</em>
</p><p>"For your detention, you are going to answer these and <em>talk. </em>You will learn to—if not <em>like—</em>at least <em>respect </em>each other, because I will have <em>none</em> of your nonsense anymore. In case you should attempt to lie to each other, the charms inlaid into the parchment <em>will </em>sting you. The door will open when all the questions are answered fair and square. <em>Begin." </em></p><p>McGonagall barked in a low, calm voice as she handed them a piece of parchment each and slammed the doors shut on her way out of the classroom. </p><p>Harry just stared dumbly at the list of 36 questions in his hands then glanced at the locked doors. He bit his lip and slowly stood and approached them, pulled his wand and attempted a couple of spells—some more advanced than others, though nothing yielded any effect.</p><p>"In case it has escaped your notice Potter, that is <em>Minerva McGonagall. </em>No spell you could possibly conceive and cast will do shit against hers." Malfoy's cold drawl startled Harry.</p><p>He'd done fine pretending that the other wasn't there. His heart hurt enough on a daily basis just having to carry all of Malfoy's resentful glares and scathing comments around, he didn't fancy going through a baring session with him and getting mocked for each of his answers. </p><p>It was ridiculous to love someone who despised him this much.</p><p>"Well if you're so eager to bare your heart out to me then be my guest." Harry snipped back, his response lacking bite, he was just <em>tired.</em></p><p>Malfoy said nothing, and Harry glanced back to find his expression pensive as he read the questions. Dejected, Harry walked back and sat opposite Malfoy, faced him and sighed again.</p><p>"Shit, guess we don't have a choice. I'll start then." He mumbled in abject defeat and read the first question aloud from his list:</p><p>"If you could invite anyone in the world to dinner, who would it be?" Harry leaned back in his chair as he pondered this and a pang echoed through him. "My parents. I've heard so much about them, but I'd like to meet them and see what they were like for myself." He answered, and was pleasantly surprised to find he wasn't stung. He <em>was  </em>being honest after all. All Harry could hope for was that Malfoy's aforementioned conscience would be powerful enough to halt his scathing tongue. </p><p>Harry gave him a <em>'well?'  </em>look when Malfoy said nothing for a long while. When he spoke, he said it so quietly Harry almost didn't hear him:</p><p>"....Dumbledore."</p><p>The raven felt as if a spike went through him—there was nothing he could say to that, although he was pretty certain Malfoy would hex him even if he tried. </p><p>Malfoy hastily read the next question, clearing his throat a bit more than necessary:</p><p>"Would you like to be famous? In what way?" </p><p>Harry felt a snort bubble out of him at that question, and it appeared as though even Malfoy was just a tad amused at it.</p><p>"Yeah, well, I wish I weren't, it's not glamorous or any fun." He answered.</p><p>Malfoy shrugged with one shoulder:</p><p>"I don't care." </p><p>No sooner had he spoken had he hissed in pain as a little snick stung over his cheekbone. </p><p>He was lying. </p><p>Harry said nothing, tilted his head. He could've figured that Malfoy had lied even if he hadn't got stung, because Malfoy <em>was </em>famous, well, rather, <em>infamous. </em>And there was no way he didn't care.</p><p>Malfoy grit his teeth:</p><p>"I don't want to—be famous for—" He trailed off, face scrunched up.</p><p>Harry figured he could spare him:</p><p>"For the wrong reasons, yes." </p><p>Malfoy looked surprised, but he said nothing, so Harry just read the next question as if nothing ever happened:</p><p>"Before writing a letter, do you ever rehearse what you are going to write? Why?" Alright, that one was a little less depressing, which Harry appreciated. "I do, yeah, because if I don't, I'll forget something."</p><p>Malfoy nodded and answered himself:</p><p>"Me too, I like a letter to be quick and to the point."</p><p>He read the next question:</p><p>"What would constitute a 'perfect' day for you?" </p><p>Harry imagined it for a second, smiled at the tranquil haze his imagination supplied the imagery:</p><p>"Just a day where no one is following me around and trying to violate me and my privacy. I suppose just a peaceful day."</p><p>Malfoy was silent again—which meant either he was going to attempt to lie or his answer would be something depressing.</p><p>"I guess just a bit of reading or something..." He eventually mumbled, aaand—got stung. Yep, lying it was then. He scowled as another snick drew in beneath the first one.</p><p>"You'll leave here completely disfigured if you keep this up." Harry pointed out, but Malfoy's glare shut him up. It was sad to see really, how much of himself Malfoy felt the need to hide and lie about. </p><p>"....A day where...no one...approaches and—" He started again, and Harry's stomach dropped. He'd seen it—people coming up to Malfoy to dig around the past they had no right to be digging around.</p><p>"When did you last sing to yourself? To someone else?" Harry quickly read aloud, smoothly cutting Malfoy off, and gave him a pointed look to drop it. It seemed as if the spell didn't mind if they didn't finish their answers, only if they tried to lie. Small mercies, he supposed.</p><p>"I sing to myself in the shower all the time." Harry chuckled—could've <em>sworn </em>a faint flush dusted Malfoy's cheeks—"Don't think I've ever sung to anyone else." He didn't want to admit to it, because it ranked top among his most embarrassing moments, and yelped as a fiery burn simmered across his own cheeks. Bloody hell, McGonagall wasn't kidding, this <em>hurt. </em>"Ah <em>fine, </em>I might've sang to Cho back in fourth. <em>God, </em>it was <em>awful."</em></p><p>"Must've been, coming from you." Malfoy smirked and Harry just sighed and looked away. Why was he doing this to himself? "I last sang to myself summer after fifth and never to anyone else." Malfoy answered, didn't elaborate, though he didn't need to. </p><p>Harry looked back at him as he read another question aloud:</p><p>"If you were able to live to the age of 90, and retain either the mind or body of a 30 year old for the last 60 years of your life, which would you want?"</p><p>What an odd question. Harry had never really figured he'd live to see 20, let alone 30 and let alone alone 90.</p><p>But as he thought about it now, he thought about all the older people in his life. The first person that popped into his head was Dumbledore, how wise and calm the man was, how he always seemed to have advice for any issue.</p><p>"The body, definitely. I like the wisdom and experiences of older folk, I'd like to retain that, but still look good." Harry answered then. He wanted to grow old and wise, but he also wanted no back pain and arthritis. </p><p>Malfoy looked disinterested with this question, as he spoke:</p><p>"The mind. I'd like to feel young and strong even when I'm old and frail."</p><p>It certainly made for an interesting mental image. Malfoy as a granpa. It made Harry snort. God he couldn't even picture it properly.</p><p>"What? What's so funny Potter?" Malfoy arched a brow and Harry shook his head:</p><p>"Just...imagining you as an old granpa is simply..." </p><p>Malfoy shook his head, appeared to crack a smile even:</p><p>"I know."</p><p>Harry was inordinately pleased to find that things weren't as tense as until then. To learn that they didn't <em>have  </em>to be, if only Malfoy allowed himself to relax.</p><p>Harry looked at the next question, and his stomach dropped seven floors:</p><p>"Do you have a secret hunch about how you will die?" He read quietly.</p><p>He didn't need to look at the blonde to know he'd gone just as frozen as Harry.</p><p>"....Well I already died once, and it was by Voldemort, so I suppose that was my hunch.." Harry murmured.</p><p>Malfoy started bouncing his leg, he gritted out an answer:</p><p>"...I thought it would be <em>him, </em>then I thought I'd burn alive, but then none of those ended up doing me in."</p><p>Not wasting another second, Malfoy read the next one:</p><p>"Name three things you and your partner appear to have in common." </p><p>Harry bit his lip over a smile and scrunched up his nose. He couldn't imagine what Malfoy might say to that question. Something incredibly cynical and demeaning, for sure. Or maybe not. It was interesting to consider what they both might have in common—they seemed so different on the surface.</p><p>"Well, for one we both suck at Divination." Harry started, and saw Malfoy gearing up to protest, but cut him off before he could even open his mouth: "Don't even <em>try</em>—you stared at that teacup as if it'd offended your mother the entire lesson yesterday." Malfoy settled down and shut up. "We're both great Seekers and I guess...we're both bad tempered since we're in detention currently."</p><p>"It's your fault Potter." Malfoy muttered grouchily and Harry was hackled:</p><p>"You're the one that hexed me for no reason!" </p><p>Malfoy shot back:</p><p>"You're the one who commented about—" He cut himself off, breathing heavy.</p><p>Harry relaxed back into his chair:</p><p>"I know, I shouldn't have." He agreed. "Now go on, you have to answer the question." He changed the topic hastily before either could dwell on his impromptu apology.</p><p>Malfoy swallowed then spoke, his voice much more subdued:</p><p>"I have never thought about anything I might have in common with yo—" He didn't even get to finish the lie, the spell stung him.</p><p>Now <em>that. </em></p><p>Was interesting.</p><p>"Of course not." Harry snickered. Apparently Malfoy <em>had  </em>thought about this. Thought about Harry. The idea was gratifying in the most disturbing of ways. </p><p> <em>"Fine, </em>we are both alive, when we shouldn't have been, we both hate public attention and alright, yes, we both <em>do  </em>suck at Divination."</p><p>Harry nodded and read the next one, refusing to let himself dwell on the first thing Malfoy listed too much:</p><p>"For what in your life do you feel most grateful?"</p><p>Well that was a rather easy one to answer.</p><p>"That I'm alive and here, that I have friends that love me and I guess...that things are relatively okay now."</p><p>Malfoy's lips twitched up into an almost—<em>fond—</em>smile, which Harry didn't dare believe. </p><p>"For my mother, she's incredible." Malfoy answered then. Harry had to agree:</p><p>"She is."</p><p>Malfoy appeared shocked, arched an eyebrow and Harry huffed:</p><p>
  <em>"Obviously."</em>
</p><p>The blonde just read the next question, not bothering to say anything more on the subject:</p><p>"If you could change anything about the way you were raised, what would it be?" </p><p>Ah. Another no-brainer then.</p><p>"I definitely wouldn't have been raised with the Dursleys." Harry spoke, perhaps too fast, but it was true.</p><p>Malfoy stared at the question.</p><p>"...The prejudice." He mumbled.</p><p>Harry felt oddly proud to hear that—to hear that Malfoy <em>knew  </em>that the beliefs he'd grown up with were wrong and harmful and to see him wish to change it made Harry proud. He'd grown and matured and Harry's heart ached. It were moments like these that made Harry love him more, stronger than before, even though so far it wasn't really working out in his favour. He read the next question:</p><p>"Take four minutes and tell your partner your life story in as much detail as possible." </p><p>Well <em>fuck. </em>Both he and Malfoy groaned in unison at this, and rolled their eyes. This was just plain <em>stupid  </em>at this point.</p><p>"What question are we on?" Malfoy inquired pitifully.</p><p>Harry checked:</p><p>"Eleventh. <em>Fuck, </em>there's 36 total. We'll be here a <em>long  </em>while."</p><p>"Bloody hell." Malfoy cursed and Harry couldn't help but agree with the sentiment.</p><p>"Right. Let's just...get on with it then I suppose." Harry grouched and sighed. "Four minutes to tell you my whole life story." He snorted. "The bloody rats in the walls know my whole life story better than me at this point."</p><p>"Not necessarily." Malfoy pointed out, with thinly veiled interest in his eyes. "Sure we all know who you are and how you've become that, but no one knows, say, how you grew up or what you did in between bouts of saving the world."</p><p>Harry was taken aback by the sincerity, and a smile overtook him—accompanied by a chuckle:</p><p>"Don't you sound interested?" </p><p>Malfoy bristled for a moment, face flickering before he seemed to accept Harry's teasing and let it go:</p><p>"Sure, whatever helps you sleep at night, Potty. Now, get on with it." </p><p>He accepted the jab with about as much grace as Harry had expected someone as proud as Malfoy to do so, that is to say <em>oh so very little,</em> which was sort of endearing in its own lethal way, Harry acknowledged, then started talking:</p><p>"In between my <em>'bouts of saving the world'  </em>I gorged myself on Molly's cooking, obsessed over Quidditch and made fun of Ron constantly. That's about it. As far as my childhood goes..." Harry trailed off, wondering how to put it gently enough so that it doesn't sound shockingly tragic, it isn't really. He isn't opposed to talking about it, he believes it's an important lesson everyone who so admires him should learn—he's human too, he was once just a boy who'd been just as mistreated as someone else might've been. He's not some deity they all seem to see. But most of the time, when he <em>does</em>  talk about it, people get this haunted look on their face, and he fears no one ever infers the right message from it that he'd like them to. "Well, I didn't really have one. My relatives...they don't like magic at all, are scared of it, they wanted to distance themselves from it as much as possible so—" It was never easy of course. "So—they kept me locked up in a cupboard under the stairs. It was—It was my room, until I turned eleven and Hagrid brought me here. Had me cook and do chores around the house for them, they're just awful people."</p><p>For a moment, it looked as though the same thing will happen with Malfoy as it does with everyone else. But then...it <em>doesn't. </em>Malfoy doesn't look haunted or ruffled at all, for a couple of  moments, he appears angry, and then—just thoughtful.</p><p>"Huh." Is all he says, though Harry discerns there's more at the tip of his tongue from the nervous flutter in his jaw. The boy doesn't press—If Malfoy wants to say it, he will. </p><p>It was the first time someone had received the story with a blank face and Harry just <em>loved  </em>it—</p><p>"Just as human as the rest of us. Who would've thought?" Malfoy said it with a sneer, Harry was certain it's meant to be insulting, but he couldn't help the joy he felt at hearing the words. Of <em>course </em>Malfoy got it, he would know.</p><p><em>"Finally, </em>someone got it." He mumbled to himself, still grinning wide. </p><p>When he looked back at Malfoy, his face was—dazed, eyes glued to Harry's cheeks and chin, soft and gray and <em>beautiful.</em> </p><p>"Got what?" He replied, almost as an afterthought—like he hadn't been paying attention and had only then realized Harry had spoken.</p><p>"The point. 'M not surprised it was you." Harry admitted, and let the moment drag. Then, just as the comfort in the silence grew too cozy to be permissible, Harry broke it: "Now, you tell me all about the high life."</p><p>Malfoy snorted, and Harry couldn't believe that this was the same Malfoy who'd been attempting to lie his way out of every question not five minutes ago. It was the tilt of Malfoy's head as he vividly described his room when he was little and all the peacocks that used to wander the grounds, how he played with them, it was the angle of his smile—sharp enough to be a distinct Malfoy smile, yet soft enough to be incredibly fond and the shade of his eyes when they rounded and warmed—Harry <em>loved  </em>him, it was a truth he couldn't get away from.</p><p>He'd started to fall when he'd found him in the bathroom, when he'd seen that the same was true of Malfoy as it was of Harry. <em>Just as human as the rest of us. </em>It had startled him then, to realize Malfoy wasn't made of stone like it initially seemed to be the case based on his dead drawl and cold sneers. To see the human side of Malfoy, under very unfortunate circumstances albeit, had been the inflection point that changed Harry's thought flow about it all. And while a million other things had been at the forefront of his mind then, growing to love Malfoy was always running in the background—it was always simply <em>there.</em> </p><p>And when he'd stood in front of Voldemort, for the briefest of moments before death struck him, the love in the background outpoured through the rest of him and it had been painless—when he'd died.</p><p>Just so, Malfoy had finished his story, his cheeks tinted a slight pink—he seemed to wait for a comment.</p><p>"It sounds like a pretty fun childhood actually. Sure, a lot of it was formal, but I suppose that's part of being pureblood, you have to know the traditions and everything else." Harry shrugged. "But it seems like there was a lot of fun to be had too." </p><p>Malfoy smiled. He <em>smiled. </em></p><p>"Yes, there was." </p><p>Malfoy read the next one:</p><p>"If you could wake up tomorrow having gained any one quality or ability, what would it be?"</p><p>It happened simultaneously. Malfoy's eyes flickered to Harry's forehead just as Harry's flickered to Malfoy's arm. </p><p>Then their gazes met and they exchanged nods, having said all they needed to.</p><p>Harry picked up the next question:</p><p>"If a crystal ball could tell you the truth about yourself, your life, the future or anything else, what would you want to know?"</p><p>"Don't let Trelawney hear you Potter." Malfoy huffed. "She'll have us staring into crystal balls for hours on end—and I'd still only be able to see my own damn reflection staring back at me." </p><p>Harry laughed:</p><p>"Not that that's that bad of a thing, mind you." He mumbled, more so to himself than Malfoy, then cleared his throat. "I think I'd like to know something more about myself, because that's useful information to me. Can't change the past or anything so it's pointless to ask that, but if I learn something deeper about myself I can work to improve, that's always good yea?"</p><p>Malfoy hummed under his breath for a moment, then bit his lip and looked away, growing poised once more:</p><p>"I'd ask about my future.." He huffed humorlessly. "If I even <em>have </em>one." It was quiet, and bitter.</p><p>Harry hated it.</p><p>"You speak as though your life's already ended. But it hasn't Malfoy." Harry shook his head. "There's plenty of ways to build yourself a future." </p><p>Malfoy flicked him a challenging arch of his brow, as if questioning Harry's sanity, which was just as well, because Harry was most definitely <em>not  </em>sane, not around Malfoy anyways: </p><p>"I mean, surely a <em>tattoo  </em>won't stop the great Draco Malfoy from taking over in a bloody coup?" </p><p>"You think I'm great?" Malfoy picked out the safest part of the sentence to respond to.</p><p>"Keep dreaming, the word suited my point." Harry snickered, even though he really <em>did  </em>think that Malfoy was great. More than, even.</p><p>"Right." Malfoy cut off any further conversation of such topics. Perhaps it was for the better that way. The blonde read the next one:</p><p>"Is there something you've dreamed of doing for a long time? Why haven't you done it?" </p><p>Harry bit his lip. There were many things he wished to do but hadn't been able to—right now though, sitting here with Malfoy, there was only one wrong he could think of attempting to right.</p><p>"There's too many to count, <em>but, </em>right now, I'd like to amend one crime from long ago. I hadn't tried to do so before now, because I'm pretty sure I'd have gotten hexed." He spoke and Malfoy appeared bemused at the mysterious wording.</p><p>"And what, pray tell, would that be?"</p><p>Harry didn't hesitate. He leaned forwards and offered a handshake.</p><p>Malfoy's eyes widened, his lips pressed into a thin line and his shoulders set as he stared at Harry's hand.</p><p>After a few heartbeats, he spoke:</p><p>"You're right about getting hexed."</p><p>Harry chuckled:</p><p>"I know."</p><p>Malfoy's eyebrow twitched. It was always the left one he arched, Harry noticed, as absurd as that observation was.</p><p>"And yet you choose to do it now regardless? I cast a mean hex Potter."</p><p>Harry's smile was earnest when he spoke with an ease he hadn't expected he'd feel:</p><p>"You've earned it now."</p><p>Malfoy snorted and waved him off:</p><p>"You say that as if it's some sort of prize."</p><p>Harry shook his head:</p><p>"No, of course it isn't any kind of prize. It's my trust, and respect. They're earned. And you've earned them now."</p><p>Harry wasn't sure how to describe what Malfoy's face did after Harry spoke—but it had Harry worried for a second. At first, he went whiter than paper, then he looked like he'd been tinged green, before finally his skin pinkened to the point it appeared uncomfortable. Harry could safely say it's the closest he'd ever seen Malfoy to being <em>unguarded. </em>And cut to the quick though he looked, it was still mesmerizing in its own right.</p><p>Malfoy took his hand and squeezed tight. They shook, and if they held on a bit longer than necessary, well....you can't prove anything.</p><p>"Did I now?" Malfoy's voice was but a breathless whisper.</p><p>"Yes." Harry affirmed resolutely.</p><p>Malfoy took a deep breath to steady himself and then cleared his throat to answer the question himself:</p><p>"Well, something I've wanted to do for a very long time was ask someone out on a date. Just to see what that would be like. Thing is, I sort of—have someone <em>specific </em>in mind but they—they'd throttle me if I attempted, so I suppose that's why I haven't done it."</p><p>
  <em>Oooh. How interesting.</em>
</p><p>"Malfoy...are you saying you're <em>in love</em>  with someone?" Harry sounded just as disbelieving as he felt. Not because he didn't think it possible for Malfoy to love someone, but because he didn't <em>want  </em>to believe it. Not really. He'd rather forever believe Malfoy was celibate—</p><p>"Why do you look so shocked?" Malfoy muttered, his face closing off slowly, as if he expected a flinty accusation of some sorts from Harry.</p><p>"Oh no, I'm not, just didn't expect it, s'all. What are they like?" He asked, despite the fact it would split him into two to hear it. </p><p>Malfoy stared at him for a long, heavy moment.</p><p>"...Brave. Very messy, sort of rugged." He started talking then. "Incredibly intense and...cute as a button."</p><p>That was pretty generic and vague enough to still qualify for an answer while giving nothing away. All Harry could infer from that is that it was probably another guy—one didn't tend to describe a lady as <em>rugged, </em>though Harry didn't discriminate.</p><p>"Clever." Harry murmured. </p><p>"What is?" Malfoy asked, apparently hearing him.</p><p>"The way you answered. All I can really gleamm with any certainty from it is that it's perhaps another guy?" </p><p>Malfoy inclined his head in confirmation and Harry hummed under his breath. </p><p>So Malfoy loved someone. Another guy. Somehow that hurt worse than when Harry believed that Malfoy was straight as a pole. </p><p>Harry pushed the bite aside and read the next one, eager to drive the topic away from Malfoy's mysterious love that wasn't him:</p><p>"What is the greatest accomplishment of your life?"</p><p>Harry chuckled at himself as his answer bubbled at the tip of his tongue, it was so painfully <em>simple.</em></p><p>"Well the obvious answer would be killing Voldemort, but I do not view killing a man as an accomplishment of any sort. To be perfectly honest, my greatest accomplishment is getting a better grade than Hermione that one time."</p><p>Malfoy burst into a fit of laughter—that had Harry's breath hitching, how unrestrained and merry it sounded.</p><p>"You're just so—" But Malfoy never told Harry what he was, he simply shook his head and put himself to rights. He opened his mouth to answer—then stopped and seemed to think it through:</p><p>"Does it count if I haven't actually done it yet?" </p><p>Harry shrugged:</p><p>"That defeats the purpose of an <em>accomplishment, </em>but go on, say it anyways."</p><p>Malfoy smirked an arrogant like smirk that always unhinged something in Harry:</p><p>"Catch the Snitch against you."</p><p>Harry thrummed with the thrill of the challenge. It was an immediate response to Malfoy's smirks and smug statements really:</p><p>"I think you're the only one who stands an actual chance at <em>accomplishing  </em>that. Best of luck." He mock saluted, but Malfoy just clicked his tongue:</p><p>"Pft, as if <em>I, </em>the <em>great </em>Draco Malfoy, need luck Potter. You'll see, I'll get you on skill alone."</p><p>Harry chortled:</p><p>"Undoubtedly." He acquiesced.</p><p>Malfoy read the next question:</p><p>"What do you value most in a friendship?"</p><p>That was a complex question to answer, there's many things Harry valued in a friend, but at the most basic, he supposed there was one thing he appreciated more than the rest:</p><p>"I like someone who's patient, I tend to be a bit slow at times so patience goes a long way."</p><p>Malfoy nodded, and suddenly looked incredibly <em>sad  </em>for a split second before he answered:</p><p>"I like someone to be....affectionate." He chewed on his lip for a moment, then continued. "I suppose it's because Pansy is very touchy-feely, I'm sort of used to it by now. She tends to fall asleep on me in the common room and I usually wait for <em>hours </em>for her to wake up. Would go all numb in that time."</p><p>The story itself sounded casual enough, but the way Malfoy punctuated the word <em>hours</em> and then paired it with a pointed look had Harry feeling like it was somehow very important. Like there was some other meaning Harry was supposed to infer from it. But <em>what?  </em>What other special meaning could there be in the story of how Malfoy lets his friends sleep on him and waits them out for hours so as to not wake them...? A feat like that required a lot of patie—<em>Oh.</em></p><p>
  <em>OH. </em>
</p><p>Hint sufficiently taken, Harry now had no idea what to do with it other than find some way to let Malfoy know he'd got it. He'd have a meltdown later over what it meant and didn't mean.</p><p>"Yeah? That's incredibly <em>patient</em> of you." Harry nodded, punctuating his own look with meaning.</p><p>He couldn't quite discern whether Malfoy was pleased or displeased Harry had gotten it, but it was Harry's turn to read a question:</p><p>"What is your most treasured memory?"</p><p>Harry could only think of one:</p><p>"My eleventh birthday—when Hagrid burst through the door to carry me away, bring me into the magical world."</p><p>Malfoy seemed to share the sentiment to a degree:</p><p>"The day I first came to Hogwarts. It felt..." He trailed off, but that was okay, because Harry knew the sentiment.</p><p>"Yeah, I know." Harry agreed. Malfoy read the next question:</p><p>"What is your most terrible memory?"</p><p>And...<em>great, </em>the bloody questions went <em>there </em>again. <em>Fun.</em></p><p>Harry's stomach swooped, but he sighed and answered all the same:</p><p>"The moment  I realized I had to die if there was any chance to defeat Voldemort."</p><p>Malfoy closed off again and Harry feared it would go back to how it was at the beginning, but then—Then the line of tension bled out of Malfoy's shoulders:</p><p>"The day I took the Mark." He answered simply, voice calm.</p><p>Harry was stunned—and incredibly <em>humbled.</em></p><p>He carried on with the questions:</p><p>"If you knew that in one year you would die suddenly, would you change anything about the way you are now living? Why?"</p><p>Harry was happy with the way things were right now in his life. He was content, and there wasn't much he'd change. Perhaps...just...</p><p>"Maybe I'd take a chance on love, but other than that, I'm pretty satisfied with how things are now."</p><p>Malfoy didn't ask, but the unspoken question was naked on his face so Harry indulged him:</p><p>"Yeah, I, too, happen to love someone." </p><p>"Do I get any details?" </p><p>Harry's heart ached. <em>Look in the mirror, </em>he wanted to tell him. He wanted to say it. But he didn't. He couldn't be <em>that  </em>blatant, but he could still tell him <em>something:</em> </p><p>"He's taller than me, and very...elegant. Very intelligent and sort of...guarded I'd say." </p><p>To this day, Harry swore up and down that it was hope that glimmered in Malfoy's eyes for the briefest of moments.</p><p>"I see, alright. Well, there's many things I'd like to change, but one year isn't nearly enough time to do that, so I suppose I'd do something I <em>can. </em>I'd ask my boy out, even if he does hex me seven ways to Sunday, I suppose if I'm to die it won't matter."</p><p>Harry nodded—that made sense.</p><p>Malfoy took his turn to read:</p><p>"What does friendship mean to you?"</p><p>"Everything—If I hadn't had my friends by my side, I'd have been dead long ago." Harry assuredly answered. It was the one thing he never doubted. He'd be lost without Ron and Hermione.</p><p>Malfoy nodded and considered:</p><p>"It's nice to have someone who'll constantly listen to you complain I suppose."</p><p>Harry laughed:</p><p>"I'll have to ask Parkinson how she feels about that."</p><p>Malfoy grinned lewdly:</p><p>"Pansy <em>loves </em>it."</p><p>Harry shook his head fondly and looked at the next one:</p><p>"What roles do love and affection play in your life?"</p><p>Well. A great deal—Malfoy was literally sitting <em>right there, </em>but it's not as if Harry could just say it. They'd just gotten to a point where they weren't cranky with each other—Harry was ecstatic to have it that way, he wouldn't be as crass as to ask for more.</p><p>"There's obviously someone I'd give my affections to if I could, but as of now, not really."</p><p>"If you could? Is that to say you can't?" Malfoy schooled his face, but his left eyebrow betrayed him again. </p><p>"Yes, that is to say I can't." Harry slowly nodded—he felt as if he was teetering dangerously close to unveiling it into the realm of obvious. Malfoy was incredibly smart—a bloody Slytherin—Harry had to take care.</p><p>"Why? There is not one person in Britain you could name that would say no to <em>you."  </em>Malfoy pointed out...did he sound bitter about it?</p><p>Harry huffed:</p><p>"There's plenty of people. For one, there's you." It was a bit self-deprecating and pitiful, but Harry couldn't help it.</p><p>Malfoy chuckled low in his throat:</p><p>"Is that really what you think?"</p><p>Harry stopped. What was Malfoy—implying? </p><p>"You're plenty rude to me—so yes." Harry slowly replied, imperceptibly leaning forwards. </p><p>"Tell me Potter, what do you think, <em>why  </em>am I so rude to you all the time?" Malfoy asked—expression a mystery.</p><p>It felt like a trap—a bomb Harry would set off with the wrong answer. </p><p>"That's a loaded question." Harry affirmed. "Before—I think you were jealous to some degree, but <em>now...</em>" He trailed off. <em>Now...</em>Well Harry had just assumed Malfoy plain didn't like him, or that he was ashamed of everything's that happened before and was taking it out in such a way—now though, none of those felt right. "I don't know." Harry admitted—he really didn't know what to make of it now that Malfoy had plain just <em>asked.</em></p><p>"You're wrong either way." Malfoy informed him, and that seemed to be the final note of that conversation, as Malfoy smoothly kept talking:</p><p>"I'd say my answer is about the same as yours."</p><p>Harry almost didn't even hear him—he was still reeling, while Malfoy read the next question:</p><p>"Alternate sharing something you consider a positive characteristic of your partner. Share a total of five items."</p><p>"Yikes." Malfoy huffed, face scrunching up. </p><p>Harry blinked a few times to get himself sorted, then chuckled breathlessly at the look on the blonde's face. He looked like he'd just tasted something disgusting.</p><p>"Oh woe is you, you have to find something to like about me, surely I'm not <em>that </em>unlikable." Harry meant it as a joke, but the question still struck. </p><p>Malfoy rolled his eyes, and Harry started them off:</p><p>"You don't think Muggles are dirt anymore."</p><p>"You're painfully forgiving." Malfoy shrugged. </p><p>That didn't sound as particularly positive, but Harry wouldn't complain. Instead, he kept going:</p><p>"You're always very calm and composed—don't know how you do it." </p><p>"Ah, you're good at Defense." Malfoy shot back.</p><p>"You always get me an O when we're paired in Potions." Harry chuckled and Malfoy mock scowled at him for a moment:</p><p>"If you actually paid <em>any </em>attention to my instructions, you could make yourself useful every once in a while."</p><p>It was a fair point. Harry spent most of Potion lessons when he worked with Malfoy incessantly staring at him and fantasizing.</p><p>"Yes, yes, but if I can have someone else do all the work for me why would I bother myself with it?" Harry snickered in reply.</p><p>"So much for Gryffindor honor." Malfoy muttered and Harry laughed:</p><p>"I wasn't actually supposed to be a Gryffindor." </p><p>Malfoy stopped—stared.</p><p>"Yeah, really. The Hat wanted to sort me into Slytherin, buuut—" Harry trailed off with a lilt in his voice.</p><p>"But?" Malfoy urged him on and Harry smiled:</p><p>"But I'd made a Slytherin enemy on the train beforehand, so I figured I wouldn't want to share a house with him when it came down to it."</p><p>Malfoy gaped at him:</p><p>"You're <em>kidding</em>  me<em>, </em>right?"</p><p>Harry shrugged:</p><p>"Wish I was, believe me."</p><p>"I cheated my house out of getting the Savior. They'd lynch me if they knew." Malfoy mumbled to himself.</p><p>"Better make sure they never find out then." Harry teased while Malfoy pouted:</p><p>"I'm hard pressed to find anything positive about you <em>now."</em></p><p>Harry laughed:</p><p>"You won't be getting out of here otherwise, so."</p><p>"Yes, yes. Hmm...I suppose you're not <em>entirely </em>graceless, though at first glance you're worse than a drunk Hippogriff.</p><p>"You would know all about Hippogriffs, I guess." Harry nodded with a bastard grin. "You're pretty funny when you aren't being rude."</p><p>Malfoy coughed for a moment, then cleared his throat hastily, flushing:</p><p>"I'm always rude, it's part of my charm." He amended.</p><p>Harry bit his lip—it wasn't a lie. Harry did so enjoy it, which was exactly why he shouldn't say anything—it was <em>messed up.</em></p><p>"I'm running out of positive things to say about you." Malfoy snicked, but then—<em>stung. </em></p><p>"Uh-huh." Harry drawled, grinning wide. Wasn't it nice that Malfoy had more than three nice things to say about him? </p><p><em>"Ugh! </em> Another positive thing about you...hm...I guess how earnest you are—it's sickeni—" He hissed in pain as he got stung again.</p><p>Harry was torn between hysterical laughter and actual genuine concern.</p><p>"Malfoy. I wasn't kidding when I said you'll leave here all disfigured, cut it out." Harry opted for concern, he figured Malfoy wouldn't take well to being laughed at currently. </p><p>There was a smattering of little stings across his face, and Harry itched to trace them with his fingers and heal them up. Just to touch him in general.</p><p>"Well, it's my turn then, hm, you're smart. Like, Hermione-levels smart." Harry listed another, then continued, eager to finish his part:</p><p>"You're powerful." He ticked off his final part of the answer.</p><p>"You're incredibly oblivious." Malfoy murmured.</p><p>Harry's brows furrowed:</p><p>"Just <em>how  </em>is that last one a <em>good  </em>thing?"</p><p>Malfoy squirmed in his seat and grew remarkably interested in the ceiling for a few moments:</p><p>"Trust me Potter, it is, formeanyways." He breathed out in a jumbled mess that Harry couldn't quite understand.</p><p>Well then.</p><p>Harry read the next question:</p><p>"How close and warm is your family? Do you feel your childhood was happier than most other people's?"</p><p>"My relatives were never close, not with me anyways, never with me. But with each other, yeah. And well, I don't consider it particularly happy, but it was alright I suppose. It could've been worse."</p><p>Malfoy appeared incredibly hackled:</p><p><em>"Potter. </em>You were locked in a <em>cupboard. </em>I do <em>not  </em>see how it could've been <em>worse." </em></p><p>Harry shrugged:</p><p>"People suffer worse."</p><p>"That doesn't mean yours was any less terrible." Malfoy's voice had risen, or perhaps Harry had imagined that. Either way, it looked as though it was very important to him for Harry to get his point.</p><p>"Alright, er, yes.." Harry nodded, feeling quite a bit out of his depth here.</p><p>But apparently, it was enough to mollify the blonde because he settled down:</p><p>"Well I was quite spoiled, always had whatever I wanted, so in that regards, yeah I suppose my childhood was happier than most, though my family was never very warm. Well, my mother was and still is, but my father not so much."</p><p>Malfoy looked at the next one and his face fell. Harry's stomach twisted as he tried to ready himself for the oncoming trainwreck.</p><p>"Hey spell, can we skip this one?" Malfoy asked, completely sotto voice while staring at the parchment intently.</p><p>Harry almost laughed then traced it on his own list and—<em>oh...</em></p><p>
  <em>How do you feel about your relationship with your mother?</em>
</p><p>"No, no, it's okay. We can't skip any—the door won't open then." Harry swallowed a lump of ache in his throat and put on a brave face. </p><p>Malfoy looked equally as uncomfortable as Harry, but he nodded all the same.</p><p>"I think...I think we'd have gotten along, my mum and me.." Harry rubbed the back of his neck and mumbled. There's nothing he could claim with certainty, of course, but he'd like to think his family would have been happy and warm had Voldemort not killed them.</p><p>"My mum and I, we're very close." Malfoy shrugged one shoulder. </p><p>Harry quickly moved on, before the heaviness of the moment settled in too deep:</p><p>"Make three 'we' statements each. For instance, 'We are both in this room feeling...'"</p><p>What an awfully presumptuous question, Harry mused.</p><p>"We need to never get on McGonagall's bad side ever again." Harry started, and Malfoy just furiously nodded. "We both want to get out of here." Again, Malfoy agreed. </p><p>"We're friends now. Or friendly at least." Harry leaned back in his chair and stretched up, his back was so cricked. </p><p>Malfoy faltered on that last one, but then nodded all the same and Harry's stomach flipped—though he wasn't too sure what to make of the tilt of Malfoy's gaze on Harry while Harry stretched.</p><p>He felt like he was missing something <em>crucial </em>here, yet he couldn't quite grasp it—his attention was ensnared by Malfoy's low murmur:</p><p>"We're both undoubtedly bored. We're having a civil, albeit forced, conversation, that to my absolute horror I find myself enjoying. We haven't killed each other yet, which frankly? I'm proud of us for managing."</p><p>"Not that we haven't tried, mind." Harry shrugged, bit his lip. To his surprise, Malfoy just snorted:</p><p>"Yes, well, it was a different time—a different us."</p><p>That was true, many things had been very different back then.</p><p>"Fair." Harry conceded. "Not <em>that </em>different though, since you still run your mouth just as much as you did back then." He joked and waved it off.</p><p>"Around you, I have to." Malfoy intoned quietly.</p><p>Such a reply shocked Harry. He stopped, stared at Malfoy with the most beseeching expression, he was sure.</p><p>"What do you mean you <em>have  </em>to?"</p><p>"I <em>mean </em>that's the only way I know how to get—Oh, <em>nevermind,</em> let's just continue and get this over with Potter." Malfoy started then stopped—huffed—and deflected the subject.</p><p>"Okaaaayy..." Harry drew out the word as he dwelled on the unfinished sentence. Running his mouth was the only way Malfoy knew how to get what?</p><p>Harry hadn't a clue what it could be—or how it related to himself, so he supposed he'd have to drop it.</p><p>Malfoy continued:</p><p>"Complete this sentence: 'I wish I had someone with whom I could share...'"</p><p>Harry figured that could go any number of ways—he hated himself for having only one stuck in his damn head. He sighed:</p><p>"I wish I had someone with whom I could share...when I'm sad I suppose. Sure, I've got my friends but they worry and fuss—immediately jump to try to fix the problem, and sometimes I'd like someone who would just listen."</p><p>For some stupid, love struck reason, Harry had a gut feeling Malfoy <em>would.</em></p><p>"I wish I had someone with whom I could share...everything I guess. Just be open." Malfoy shrugged.</p><p>For some stupid, love struck reason, Harry had a gut feeling he himself <em>would.</em></p><p>
  <em>If only he was a big enough fool to ask.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>But he wasn't.</em>
</p><p>Harry read the next one—didn't let himself go too far down that rabbit hole, it was too deep:</p><p>"If you were going to become a close friend with your partner, please share what would be important for them to know."</p><p>Close friends with Malfoy? Harry'd rather die—the heartbreak would kill him anyways though, he supposed, so it didn't matter much in the end.</p><p>"I don't tend to sleep well, and it's important to know not to try to wake me—because my magic gets a bit out of control." He said, figuring that to be the one thing that he'd had to lecture all his dormmates on. </p><p>Malfoy chewed on the inside of his cheek for a moment, then a heated blush dusted down his cheeks, just as he spoke:</p><p>"Never <em>ever  </em>talk to either Pansy or Blaise."</p><p>"Why?" Harry inclined his head.</p><p>"Because—you don't want to hear what they have to say, it's all bullshit anyways—" Malfoy rambled then clamped his lips shut when he caught himself.</p><p>Harry chuckled and arched his own eyebrow:</p><p>"Yeah? Sounds more like <em>you </em>don't want me to hear what they have to say."</p><p>Malfoy geared up and waved his arms around a bit wildly:</p><p>"Same difference, Potter."</p><p>"Sure it is. I must say, I'll have to go ask them about this very interesting new turn of events as soon as we get out of here." Harry teased.</p><p>Malfoy shook his head wildly:</p><p>"No, <em>no—</em>Do <em>not."</em></p><p>He was definitely frantic.</p><p>Harry held up his hands in surrender and huffed:</p><p>"I was joking Malfoy, alright? I won't, calm down <em>geez."</em> </p><p>Malfoy nodded:</p><p>"Good."</p><p>So, Malfoy had something to hide. Something <em>important  </em>to hide—which is somehow related to Harry.</p><p>A small part of Harry wanted to dig and pry—but a bigger part of him reveled in the relative ease that breathed between them and will do nothing to compromise it.</p><p>Malfoy read the next one:</p><p>"Tell your partner what you like about them; be very honest this time, saying things that you might not say to someone you've just met." </p><p>Both he and Malfoy snorted at the same time. It would be a much shorter list to ask him what he <em>doesn't  </em>like about Malfoy—there's essentially nothing. </p><p>"Well, I've always liked how elegant you are. Maybe it's a Pureblood thing, or maybe I'm just a gormless clutz, but the way you move always looked graceful. Hm, I suppose another thing I like is how you have this unhealthy obsession with green apples."</p><p>Malfoy arches his left brow—even <em>that  </em>looks elegant in its own right:</p><p>"Says the man who <em>inhales  </em>treacle tart."</p><p><em>"Awh, </em>you noticed." Harry chortled, then jerked his chin to urge Malfoy to answer himself.</p><p>After a moment, he does:</p><p>"It's hard to find very many things to like on you—" And he got stung.</p><p>Harry furrowed his brows. He'd thought they were past attempting to lie. Apparently not? However, Malfoy only ever seemed to attempt to lie with questions like this one. The questions that asked for his actual opinion—as if he wanted to either outright <em>hide  </em>something, or somehow demean its value by tacking on an insult beforehand. </p><p>And Harry didn't really understand <em>why.</em></p><p><em>"Oh come on—</em>I was getting to it—" Malfoy's loud bitching snapped Harry out of his train of thought, while Malfoy yelled at the spell.</p><p>It would've been endearing, was Harry not so confused. </p><p>"I like your eyes Potter, they're very green." Malfoy continued after he'd huffed it all out on McGonagall's magic. "I like how you fly." He shrugged and there was that.</p><p>Yet, by this point, Harry was unshakable in his conclusion that there was definitely <em>more </em>that Malfoy had either unconsciously or consciously been hinting at throughout this entirely too long and too harrowing detention.</p><p>And Harry had never burned with want for knowledge more than in that moment—Hermione would be proud of him.</p><p>...Or maybe not, considering his study subject.</p><p>It was Harry's turn to read a question:</p><p>"Share with your partner an embarrassing moment in your life."</p><p>Oh <em>Gods </em>no. </p><p><em>"Hell."  </em>Harry cursed under his breath. </p><p>Malfoy colored strangely too:</p><p><em>"Please  </em>tell me we're almost through."</p><p>Harry checked the numbers and exhaled in relief:</p><p>"Yeah, this is the 29th. Almost there." </p><p>Sighing, he chewed on his lip as he picked through the many times he's made an utter fool of himself in his life in his head, and eventually settled on a moment that Malfoy and he could get a healthy chuckle out of. Harry didn't trust Malfoy to bite his tongue with something more important—yet at the same time, he wanted <em>so much  </em>to take that risk.</p><p>He couldn't bring himself to.</p><p>"Well, I suppose sneaking out at night to duel is pretty embarrassing." He said instead. He supposed it's partly due to the fact that there's something underlying all of this, something <em>more </em>that Harry can't decipher and doesn't want to put too much out in case he somehow ruins it.</p><p>A slow, nostalgic smile curled over Malfoy's lips:</p><p>"We had <em>no idea  </em>then." He muttered.</p><p>"No idea of what?" Harry prodded, he isn't quite sure what Malfoy might be talking about.</p><p>"Of just how much we'd imprint upon each other." Malfoy elaborated, he sounded...<em>sad </em>about it and it cut Harry.</p><p>"We really didn't." Harry agreed mutely.</p><p>"Anyhow, I suppose it's my turn then. Well, seeing as you've shared a memory that has me in it, it seems only fair for me to do the same. However Potter." His glare hardened. "You aren't allowed to crack even the tiniest of smiles, otherwise I'll..." Here he trailed off, and Harry really wanted to know where he'd take that threat.</p><p>"You'll what?" Harry was amused, because for the first time it feels as if it's all in good-nature, Harry thoroughly enjoyed it.</p><p>"I'll hex you?" Malfoy tried, but all his pretense of being serious dropped and he huffed: "Bloody hell, when I was turned into an animal." He gave up and puffed it all out.</p><p>Harry felt it. Laughter bubbling inside him as the memory of Malfoy getting tossed about as a ferret replayed before his eyes—but then he ruthlessly clamped down on it. He wouldn't crack the tiniest smile, just to indulge Malfoy.</p><p>"Okay." He said evenly instead—and Malfoy looked pleasantly surprised, relieved and perhaps a tad impressed that Harry hadn't laughed at him.</p><p>The blonde read the next question:</p><p>"When did you last cry in front of another person? By yourself?"</p><p>Harry's heart immediately <em>sank </em>into the deepest, darkest pits of hell he'd condemned it to after Snape shooed him out of that damned bathroom. He swallowed thickly and <em>prayed </em>that Malfoy's answer won't be what he feared.</p><p>"The last time I...cried, in front of someone else, is well, when Sirius died...And by myself...well, I think it was back while I was living with Dursleys."</p><p>It had taken Harry a while to recover from Sirius. He'd scared Ron and 'Mione shitless that summer.</p><p>Malfoy was silent for a long time—and Harry <em>knew. </em></p><p>He couldn't look at the blonde, he feels sick with himself—nearly killing the man he loves.</p><p>"I don't really cry much by myself, Merlin forbid in front of anyone else, I'm not much of a crier...The last that happened was..." He trailed off, sounding just as weak and unwilling to speak of it as Harry felt. "...The bathroom." He finally muttered out, and Harry still couldn't bring himself to look at him.</p><p>"...Did it scar?" Harry asked, even though he doesn't want to know. Not really. He doesn't want to know the price Malfoy had paid for Harry's idiocy.</p><p>Malfoy's voice was gentle when he spoke, a mercy Harry loved him so much for granting:</p><p>"Yes..." </p><p>"I'm..." <em>Sorry. </em>That doesn't nearly cover the scope of what Harry is, nor will it ever be enough to mend anything, but Harry needed to say it even though the words were bladed in his throat.</p><p>But Malfoy only nodded, as if he understood.</p><p>They said nothing more for a long time.</p><p>It was only when Harry's regret over that day collected behind his eyelids and threatened to spill out that he read the next question in a thick voice:</p><p>"Tell your partner something that you like about them already."</p><p>It was a light enough question to drag the murdered mood out of the slump, salvage things a bit.</p><p>"Didn't we do this like...a few questions ago?" Harry mumbled, then shook his head. What did it matter. He'd never tire of telling Malfoy everything he liked about him anyways. Even if it was buried under a hundred false pretenses and faked indifference. </p><p>"I like your hair, now that you don't dollop half a gallon of gel into it, it looks sort of soft?" Harry didn't know how explain it—every word that came to him felt like an understatement.</p><p>Malfoy bit his lip, almost as if he were concealing a smile, before he rearranged his face and spoke:</p><p>"I like that you're shorter than me, even if it's just a little." </p><p>Harry stopped to ponder over that—but Malfoy was already reading the next one:</p><p>"What, if anything, is too serious to be joked about?" </p><p>Well that was quite obvious.</p><p>"The war." They spoke in unison and Harry moved on to the next one, eager to get through the last couple of questions as soon as possible. This had likely been one of the most exhausting detentions he'd ever sat through.</p><p>Odd as it may sound for one to find being forced to essentially spend quality time with their love vexing, it just left Harry feeling too raw.</p><p>"If you were to die this evening with no opportunity to communicate with anyone,what would you most regret not having told someone? Why haven't you told them yet?"</p><p>Staring at Malfoy...at <em>Draco</em>, Harry blurted out the answer without ever really thinking it through;</p><p>"Not telling y—<em>the guy </em>I love that I love him. The news wouldn't be well received coming from me—but still." </p><p>Draco's brow knitted:</p><p>"What do you mean <em>'coming from you'?"</em></p><p>
  <em>Fuck. Oh shit—</em>
</p><p>"Nothing! Just—Just because of who he is and who I am—" Harry bit his tongue mercilessly, certain he'd surely given it away by now. </p><p>But Draco's face didn't twitch a zilch. In fact, his expression turned completely bland.</p><p>"And who is he?" Draco asked, slowly, carefully.</p><p>Harry's throat went drier than sand, his voice stuck. The words were stuck to the roof of his mouth, but he couldn't say them. Even if he <em>did </em>want to tell Draco he loved him, which he doesn't, he'd certainly not want to do it in the middle of bloody detention—Harry always wanted to say those words in a meaningful way, to anyone he would fall in love with.</p><p>"Someone." Harry said, a note of finality in the word that he hoped would indicate to Draco to drop it.</p><p>He did, instead answered himself:</p><p>"I'd regret not asking my boy out."</p><p>They seemed to be in the same situation then, though Harry didn't dwell on it too much.</p><p>Draco read the next question:</p><p>"Your house, containing everything you own, catches on fire. After saving your loved ones and pets, you have time to safely make a final dash to save any one item. What would it be? Why?"</p><p>For one horrible moment, Harry's vision flashed with the sight of the Burrow burning down.</p><p>He shook himself out of it:</p><p>"Probably my Invisibility cloak. It's....the only thing I have from my father, it means a lot. Plus, it makes sneaking around mighty easy." </p><p>Draco chuckled and shook his head:</p><p>"Doesn't it ever." He bit his lip as he considered his answer then, and Harry felt his eyes trace the motion. "Well, I'd probably save my old journals—most of them are humiliating, but its memories so." He shrugged with one shoulder.</p><p>Harry nodded, he'd want to save something of sentimental value like that too. He looked the second to last question.</p><p><em>Finally, </em>almost done.</p><p>"Of all the people in your family, whose death would you find most disturbing? Why?"</p><p>Well <em>fuck, </em>really? Taking a nosedive right into depression again.</p><p>"I don't want to think about any of the Weasleys dying." Harry shuddered—tasted bile in his mouth when Fred's face flashed through his mind. "Any of them would devastate me." Harry shook his head to rid it of such dark thoughts.</p><p>Draco nodded:</p><p>"Yes. Well, it's not that surprising that it would be my mother's." He looked haunted at the thought—Harry wanted to reach out and hug him.</p><p>Merlin, this wasn't healthy. Not at all. This deep <em>want.</em></p><p>He wasn't sure where they stood now either. They'd made peace—of that much Harry was certain, but he was <em>also </em>certain that there was something <em>more  </em>that had dragged beneath the sway of their entire detention, which was now coming to an end. And beyond <em>that,</em> he wasn't certain of absolutely <em>anything</em>.</p><p>
  <em>One last question.</em>
</p><p>Draco read it:</p><p>"Share a personal problem and ask your partner's advice on how they'd handle it. Also, ask your partner to reflect back to you how you seem to be feeling about the problem you have chosen."</p><p>This was it. Get through this and they were out of here.</p><p>"Rue the day I'm asking a Slytherin for advice." Harry snorted gracelessly to himself and Draco laughed right alongside him:</p><p>"You will." He affirmed merrily.</p><p>"How reassuring." Harry deadpanned flatly. "Well then, here's my problem for you to ever so graciously solve." He bit his lip and hesitated for but a moment. "If I'm talking to someone, but I sense there's something <em>more </em>going on, what's the best way to go about figuring it all out without outright just asking like a berk?" </p><p>Draco's lips twitched and he leaned back into his chair, crossed his arms across his chest.</p><p>"Come now Potter—the answer is easy—<em>pay attention  </em>to your partner." He said it casually, but his leg was bouncing. "Besides, you look like you've got it all figured out, or you <em>think </em>you do, or you're at the brink of it anyways, so I don't see what you need my advice for."</p><p>Harry laughed soundlessly, and shrugged. Draco had a point. </p><p>"Now, you come ask advice from a Gryffindor—and I'll be ready with an Episkey for your pride afterwards."</p><p>Draco flipped him the bird and Harry blubbered a half-chuckle-half-snort at the gesture.</p><p>"Your whole shtick is being honest and open, right? Yes, so—How would you go about apologizing to someone for something <em>really  </em>bad you once did to them?" Draco chewed on his lip all the while.</p><p>Harry had had to apologize a fair few times in his life, he was known to fuck up quite often, and it really all depended on <em>who </em>he was apologizing to, but no matter that, what ultimately mattered most was that the apology is genuine and heartfelt.</p><p>"Depends upon who do you want to apologize to and for what, because not every wrong is equal and not every person is equally as forgiving. But the most important thing is that it's an honest apology—from the heart y'know." Harry explained. "Judging by the fact you even felt the need to ask, I'd say you want to apologize to someone you've done <em>a lot</em> of <em>very big  </em>wrongs to and aren't entirely sure they'll even hear you out let alone accept the apology."</p><p>Draco bristled and shifted in his seat:</p><p>"Yes well, that was disgustingly Gryffindor."</p><p>Harry smiled fondly and tilted his head to the left:</p><p>"Does that mean your ego will need that Episkey after all?"</p><p>Draco groaned:</p><p>"You're insufferable—"</p><p>"Thank you." Harry cut in pleasantly, batting his eyelashes.</p><p>That should be it, now. </p><p>"So, is that it?" Draco asked as he stood and Harry followed, stretching. His arse had gone numb from sitting down for so long.</p><p>Harry supposed it should be. They'd answered all the questions. He made to the door and grabbed to open it but—it didn't budge.</p><p>"Err, what?" He muttered and about-faced Draco again who appeared equally as confused.</p><p>"Was there anything else on the parchment? Check." Harry jerked his chin at the parchment, and Draco picked it up with a quiet hum.</p><p>His eyes scanned the page and he squinted at some tiny text at what appeared to be the very bottom.</p><p>"Oh <em>hell. </em>Says here we have to spend four minutes looking into each other's eyes in silence to complete this whole quandary." He spat resentfully.</p><p>...Harry just stared at him for a moment.</p><p><em>"Quandary?  </em>Really?" Harry didn't even know what that stupid word meant.</p><p>Draco looked at him with this flat expression—as if Harry's the crazy one here.</p><p>"It means delicate situation, Potter. <em>Honestly." </em> He shook his head. Harry pinched the bridge of his nose and set up a wand alarm to buzz after four minutes pass:</p><p>"Could've just <em>said so.</em> Come here then." Harry outstretched a hand and beckoned Draco closer. </p><p>Draco's expression flickered as he took a couple of steps closer. He was right in front of Harry, whom was almost pressed to the door.</p><p>"Four minutes was it?" Harry's voice dropped to a whisper—he shouldn't have called Draco closer, he couldn't handle it as well as he'd hoped.</p><p>Draco just swallowed and nodded, and Harry tipped his head up to gaze into the blonde's eyes, though if Draco was only to tilt his chin downwards ever so slightly they'd <em>kiss.</em></p><p>Harry felt frozen against the door as he dived into the lightest dove gray he'd ever seen.</p><p>At first, Harry could feel his heart pounding in his throat, could feel his limbs growing cold—but soon all feeling faded as he studied all that swam through the layered sway in Draco's eyes.</p><p>His eyes were the color of frost, but they were <em>far  </em>from cold. No, his eyes were endless and intense like the afternoon sun. And deep, <em>oh so deep. </em>There was so much for Harry to reach out to, he didn't know what to do. </p><p>Words bubbled at the tip of his tongue, pressed to the back of his front teeth, anything to shatter this raw, vulnerable moment—too intimate, too scathing.</p><p>But Harry swallowed them, he refused to cave and break.</p><p>He let the tide overtake him—it wasn't as terrifying as he'd thought it might be. This deep, mute longing in Draco's eyes welcomed him, pulled him under.</p><p>And that's when he <em>knew.</em></p><p>Knew what had flown through their conversation, a quiet simmer that he couldn't reach, couldn't understand, but now he knew, because now he <em>saw</em>.</p><p>Draco loved him.</p><p>Any doubt Harry felt boiling at that resounding verdict cooled away, melted, the longer he spent picking out emotions out of Draco's eyes. It was clear, now, there was nothing to obscure it, the adoration and warmth.</p><p>Draco tipped his chin downwards as he discovered the same imprint of Harry's heart in Harry's own eyes, and Harry went cold and still—the world around him stopped, time itself, everything frozen in this single moment. He tilted his chin higher and then—</p><p>The wand alarm buzzed and hissed, broke the moment, they both flinched away from each other as they startled. </p><p>Harry collapsed against the door behind him, reality crashing through the pop in his ears while Draco pressed a hand over his mouth and buried his other in his own hair and tugged, pacing the width of the classroom. </p><p>Harry managed to slowly guide his lungs through inhaling and exhaling—in that time Draco had stopped pacing and sat on a desk, leg bouncing. He stared ahead at Harry—eyes, wide and frantic—unfocused.</p><p>"It's me." Harry whispered—unable to hitch his voice louder, the wisps of the touch they nearly shared coiling around Harry's heart. He finally melded the truth around his mouth. It tasted like sugar.</p><p>"It's you." Draco murmured in his own low whisper, blinking slowly to focus his sight. "And it's me, too." He continued.</p><p>"Yes, it is you." Harry affirmed, released the words from his lips, although not how he'd imagined he'd speak them. <em>I love you. </em>Is what he thought he'd say, though he was glad it had turned out this way, he wished to save <em>that</em> for a more special moment.</p><p>After all, now there was a very <em>real  </em>chance to live unto that moment.</p><p>"Okay." Harry was breathless with the ache of his smile. </p><p>"Okay?" Draco pushed off the table, just how Harry pushed away from the door. "Just okay?" His voice was light and very, <em>very  </em>high, though far be it from Harry to point out to him that he sounded like he was stoned on helium. </p><p>Where was the fun in that?</p><p>They made towards each other. </p><p>"Show me better, if it offends you." Harry purred as they faced each other, Harry's arms settled against Draco's, their fingers fanned over each other's elbows. </p><p>"I can?" Draco asked in a quiet, stricken voice that warmed Harry's very bones. He pressed in closer, tilting his head up.</p><p>"You can." Harry smiled, and that was all the incentive Draco needed to lower his head and kiss Harry. </p><p>Harry's eyes fluttered closed, he tilted his head, returned the kiss.</p><p>The door was now unlocked.</p><p>~</p><p>
  <em>Fin.</em>
</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Source: http://36questionsinlove.com/</p><p>Find more on my <a href="https://missdrarrydawn.tumblr.com/">Tumblr</a></p></blockquote></div></div>
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